Sunday, September 15, 2013

22 weeks

I love keeping track of these weekly posts, however sporadic they end up occurring.

22 weeks and then some, nesting has kicked into high gear. I spent the majority of Friday and Saturday cleaning, purging, organizing, prepping, and making list after list of what needs to happen in the next few months. Amazingly, I have no intention of stopping anytime soon. Steve even quipped, "Wow, you're on a roll - don't stop."

Emotions have gotten the best of me over the past few days. Cutter has begun to express much more interest in the baby, perhaps now with the certain knowledge of her gender and name. He affectionately prays for baby Moxie and yesterday I had a glimpse into his tender heart. He was sitting next to me as we played babies with Scout. He started to tell me how he was going to be Moxie's big brother too, and that he would let her play with his toys, and share in the things that he gets to be a part of in our family. He leaned down and hugged my belly and told her he loved her and that he was her big brother. Toddler comprehension is minimal at best, but he knows that she will come into our family sometime after Christmas. He lovingly offered his soft blanket to wrap her up and keep her warm, an offer I'm not sure he would carry through on given his penchant for said blanket, but the sentiment warmed my heart all the same. 

God has used my pregnancies in the past to soften my heart and awaken my recognition of my utter sinfulness apart from Christ. This pregnancy has been no exception, and I have been cognizant of my desperate need for grace and mercy every single day. I am blessed by Charles Spurgeon's Morning and Evening devotions. The other day, September 5, was an entry that spoke deep into my soul. Wherever I am, the Lord is with me, and I need not despair in that.

Cutter even chose to pose with me this morning after church, exclaiming, "Baby Moxie!" as the picture was taken. I'm so blessed by my children. They are truly a gift from the Lord and I take none of their lives for granted, including our blessing in heaven.


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